Sunday, December 20, 2009

Tunes!

I have to say, I am enjoying this Christmas season! I love having the tree up, the decorations all over the house, listening to Christmas tunes.... I'm enjoying it all! Here are some tunes to enjoy!

Sting

Nat King Cole

Snoopy

Eartha Kitt

And, such a classic, no one can do it like Bing

Saturday, December 19, 2009

With a name like, Fred, he had to be nice!

Mr Handsome used to work with this guy, "Fred," who is super nice. He's also an artist, who's very, very congenial and gracious. He had a big party tonight and invited a bunch of people and we went, even though it was RIGHT after work and I was very tired and oh-s0-very-full-of-pain. I forgot all about the tiredness and got to put the pain off to the side for awhile because we had a very good time!


There were lots of friendly people, plenty of delicious food, and excellent music. We had such a nice time! I wish we'd gone to other parties "Fred" and his wife "Wilma" have held, but we were too shy. We definitely missed out.


Friday, December 18, 2009

Mrs. Jones


My mom decided on my name. My dad told me he wanted to name me either Josephine, or Alexandra Bernice (Last Name that began with a C), so I could be ABC, initial-wise. Dad liked to joke, but ya never know!

Anyway, my mom named me after an actress who died yesterday: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0428354/

I always thought I'd grow up to be tall, blonde, and beautiful (like my mom) or tall, brunette, and beautiful (like the actress). Nope. Ah, well!

Do you know who you were named after?



Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Details

Here are some close-ups of our Christmas decorations.

A tiny little creche on the mantle:


This church just glows at night:

These birds are HEAVY, actually. They're really cute, though, and they've got GLITTER on their wings!
The snowman is absolutely covered in glitter. I love GLITTER!
The skating pond with the old metal people. The pond is really too small.and, of course, the Santa Head.


Santa and his sleigh (Rudolph is at the front, I'm just not a very good photographer!):



This is a little arrangement on one of our bookcases (another GLITTERy snowman!). The little cardinals in the little nest are so dang cute!
I hung some ornaments from the chandelier. You can see, through the french doors, the path that Mr Handsome shoveled to get to the bird feeders.
This bird (who has GLITTER on her wings) is in our little "powder room."

Mr President is with a bunch of angels on the kitchen windowsill.
That's it for now! My cold is back with a vengance, I can't call in sick, though I REALLY want to, and I gotta go to work.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

the Past

I saw this ad today.

For some reason, she makes me think of what I'd have looked like, in my early 20's, had I procreated with a guy I was seeing at the time, a guy I'll call


She looks strong and competent, if not happy. The kid looks content. My life, my self, my everything, would be soooooo different if I'd had a kid. But he definitely was NOT the right guy to be the father of MY spawn. No way. Nice enough guy, but he did prefer the ganja to the job. He was smart, attractive, clever, tall, funny, lots of really good things. But not reliable. Not willing to make sacrifices for anyone or anything, including the kid he had from a previous marriage. So. It was a no go, in all ways, eventually.

When I was a little girl, I just assumed I'd have kids, like "all" women did. As I grew up, I realized I had choices and didn't HAVE to grow a human in my body. I didn't HAVE to spread the miserable health issues my family deals with to another person. I didn't HAVE to risk giving someone a health situation that would make his (and other people's) life a living hell. I could remain child-free; it was MY choice! YAY!

Still, I occasionally feel that kick in my uterus, that baby hunger, that deep in the marrow desire to reproduce. Thank god it passes quickly. I genuinely feel sorry for women who feel that need all the time and are unable to conceive. And now I'm really getting to be too old. My eggs are old. Much bigger risk of even more health issues for the kid.

Mr. Handsome, who had an idyllic childhood, could never give me a "Yes, I do" or "No, I don't" answer to the kid question, in the past. Now, he's sure he doesn't want one. So that's a relief. And he's not worried about what might-have-beens. He says, "We didn't have any, we don't want them now, that's the way it is." I love that about him (amongst many, many other reasons), that he doesn't dwell on the past, on what might-have-been, on regrets.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Christmas decorations

We got our tree a couple of weeks ago, the earliest I think Mr Handsome and I have ever festive-ized the house!

Here's our tree:

Here's our mantle, with a little town and a skating pond on it:

Another view:


The full effect!


And the whole room!
More details and more rooms later, maybe - I'm late-ish for work again. And it's slippery outside so it'll take longer.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

snow and ice

There's a thick crust of ice on the snow now, after the big storm we got last night. More snow is on the way. It's Blizzard Time!

I think I'll walk to work - good exercise and I don't have to worry about crashing the car. I've been caught up in worrying lately. At work last week, I mae a stuuuuupid mistake and couldn't figure out how to fix it. My coworker was trying to help, but I just kept getting more and more frustrated to the point where she actually said "you need to calm down." Which, of course, is very embarrassing and never works. It just adds another layer of anxiety. I felt (and still feel) so guilty that this very preggers woman, with two little children (and a rather gormless hubby) at home waiting for her, stayed with me to the bitter end of this stupid debacle. She had it figured out - I still am somewhat confused. I'm embarrassed and ashamed. Of course, it's all ancient history now, so I'm gonna just try to let that go.
I've got a beloved friend who is in such a dark place, suicidal. I can't help, I can't be there - all I can do is let him know he's loved and there are people who would be so sad if he wasn't on this earth. Not enough, not enough.... I wish there was something I could do. I'm glad he's at least trying to get help, though, with a therapist and pharma magic. But he says it's not helping.

I'm late for work. Gotta go. It's a cold, dark day.
~~~
Ok, I had to share this, silly though it is - I'm at work, had to drive to be on time (make-up did NOT work today, had to fix, took lots of time, grrrr) so didn't get any exercise, but then I was shoveling the icy slushy snow from the store's sidewalks. A kind angel had shoveled once, but it needed it again. So, I shoveled, got all hot and sweaty, took off my sweater to cool down and my bra broke. I'm going to have to be braless at the bookstore today. My C-cups don't like to be unsupported. Luckily, I have a big scarf, so I'll be somewhat camoflaged.
Actually, it's pretty comfy!